I’m fine.

So I’ve gotten more than one phone call since my last post… So I just wanted to clarify to everyone that I’m doing fine. I’m really enjoying time here, I just wanted to put that into context with the “Bigger Picture”.

Yesterday was payday. Payday means new music. I have some really good new acquisitions:

One From The Vault
One From The Vault – The Grateful Dead

Shakedown Street
Shakedown Street – The Grateful Dead

The Yes Album
The Yes Album – Yes

Close to the Edge
Close to the EdgeYes
Yes totally kicks butt. Especially in Close to the Edge. It’s Bill Bruford on drums, who I have a growing obsession over.

The ugliness of life

Disclaimer: Nothing is wrong. Just pausing to reflect.

When I went back down to Arizona, a lot of people asked me how life is here. I kind of spouted the general, “Oh, I love it here…” stuff, plus a boilerplate response about how everyone on my floor is awesome, how I really like my job, and how glad I am to have found a good church. Those aren’t lies – they’re very true. But life isn’t all dandy.

The daily grind is as pointless as it ever was. I wake up – late – missing the first three classes of the day. (I’ve done that 2 days in a row. I am screwed.) I shower, stumble around the room, gather my stuff, turn on my iPod (sure, the new one’s nice, but is it $350 nice?) and wish that I had more time to sit down and enjoy a good breakfast. Instead, I get out the door barely before I have to be at school or work,  struggle with an overcomplicated bike lock (my paranoia insists!), and slouch my way through work or class thinking about things I can do when I’m done.

I get home. I leave the door open, hoping that people will drop in to say “hi”- but they largely don’t, because my desk is out of view of the doorway. I surf the web. I listen to music. I remember something that I wanted to go to that night, but don’t end up going for some reason. I go down with everyone to dinner- every night, it’s some variant of mexican food, fried chicken, or panini. I go back upstairs, want to hang out with people, but it seems that everyone has gone out. The only way for “real fun” around here is to go get drunk (today is “Wasted Wednesday”.)

I sit around more… Play Final Fantasy…. Derek comes in from next door, and he’s just as bored as I am.

I get into some task (almost never homework). It takes me until maybe 1 A.M. to decide to stop and go to bed- and I’ll be back up at 6 the next morning. Unless it’s Saturday, in which case I’ll see you tomorrow afternoon.

All of this is my daily life as I pursue degrees in college. Degrees that some future employer will hopefully appreciate and hire me for a “successful” job. Assuming that there is a demand for that job- and that that demand isn’t in India. Meanwhile, I distract myself with these classes and work, sliding by and busying myself with things that I don’t really care too much about- and distracting myself from the things that do matter to me.
This is a very exaggerated, dark, yet true view of my daily life. I feel pretty happy about what I have going for me, and college is everything that I expected it to be. I love being free of the nusciences of high school. But I remind myself occasionally of my real purpose on this earth: to be a living, breathing proclamation of God’s Glory. I have already come to the realization that this is the only pursuit worth anything in this world. I am here ultimately because I want to serve him better; I don’t know how yet, but he’s told me to keep honing my skills. That is not the goal for most people in College- and so it’s very easy for me to get lost in the routine and forget about this goal. I constantly find myself thinking about how much I want worldly things: better skills, new stuff, A GIRLFRIEND… I think about these things all day. Rarely do I find myself longing to glorify God and become more intimate with him. I don’t have a hunger for Him yet. It’s growing. He’s working in me, and I am slowly but surely surrendering more to Him. But right now it’s a process of spending 90% of my time on pointless things, and then realizing that I’ve just wasted the precious time that He has given me.

Laptop, resurrected. Productivity, still dead.

I got the replacement hard drive from Dell today- fast shipping, one business day. I feel like I’m playing Monopoly, because this is a total Dell Error in My Favor. I had a 100GB drive. They gave me a 120GB drive. Freakin’ sweet.

Unfortunately, they sent the thing pre-imaged, but only halfway, so when I booted the thing it locked up for an hour while it installed America Online, NetZero, “Adobe Elements”, and tons of other crap that I don’t need. So I took the opportunity to just wipe the whole darn thing and start from scratch with a good ol’ XP Pro disc.

Big mistake. I’ve spent the last 7 hours or so reinstalling drivers, files, and software. It’s not done yet- but it’s 1:30 AM and I’m really tired. I also need to work on an assignment for BG200 that is ominously close to a due date. Blar.

I am learning to hate the Housing department’s evil software. They use Cisco Clean Access, which scans your computer for up-to-date virus & anti-spyware definitions, as well as windows patches. Fair enough- I made sure to update all three with my new install.

Clean Access thinks I have an unpatched version of Windows. Microsoft Update can’t find anything that I need. So I can’t get access to the network until then. It’s especially annoying since this part is basically identical to my duties at work, and we have a much better solution to verify client security without making the client jump through five million hoops to authenticate themselves.

But, more importantly, Final Fantasy VII works again.

Dead laptop

My laptop’s hard drive committed suicide at 35,000 feet last night. I was using it on the plane and the whole thing just died. I think a head’s out of place, dragging straight across the platter, because it’s awfully noisy. Nothing will boot, even a Live CD.

Luckily I shelled out a couple of benjamins for the good warranty… a new drive’s on the way, and I can install it myself. And did a complete backup of my hard drive right before I left for Arizona.

I’m computer-less for a few days… Not the biggest deal. Probably a good thing. See y’all soon.

Arizona

I’m flying back to Colorado in a couple of hours…

I had a blast here. I didn’t do so much of the crazy I-need-to-go-hang-out-with-this-person-for-ten-minutes-now thing as I had planned. I didn’t go to ASU like I wanted… Didn’t have any way of getting there on Friday :-/

I went to McClintock early Friday morning and met up with Pat to go laugh at Drumline. It was fun… but very weird. I don’t think I’ll go back again… I’m glad to be out, and I don’t really miss it. I have good memories from there, but I have moved on. That said, I do miss doing drumline, and still plan on doing it next year.

Went to the LZ and watched several episodes of The Office… that show is addicting. We watched the first Jackass movie, too… Those guys are insane.

So yeah. Arizona was a blast…. I’ll probably have a heck of a time readjusting my sleep schedule (I’ve been up till 4 the last two nights…). And I’m ready to come back to CSU.

Oh, yeah… David and Ethan got together again, too:

100_2564.JPG   100_2565.JPG

A month…

Wow. It’s been that long already. It totally doesn’t feel like it; part of me still thinks that I’m at camp, and will be going home any day now. But I’m not, and I’m gonna be here for about 8 more months, and that doesn’t bother me at all. I haven’t blogged much in the last month, so I guess I’ll summarize a bit here.

I am definitely happy with my choice to leave Arizona, study CIS, and do so at Colorado State. I think that even though Santa Cruz was (and maybe still is) my top choice, it would have been a much harder transition to make; I wouldn’t just be around totally new people, but I’d be completely new to my surroundings as well. I know CSU like the back of my hand already, from spending about 6 months here over 3 summers, and that has helped. It’s kind of like the best of both worlds: I’m in a completely new set of people, so I can start fresh without everyone nagging me about the stuff I did freshman year, but I still feel like I stayed at home because I know the town, I know the campus, and it doesn’t feel foreign to me.

Colorado is so beautiful. CSU is a land grant campus, so there are tons of big, grassy fields that you have to cross in order to get to class. They also provide a majestic view of the Rocky Mountains, which are only a couple of miles away. They knew this when they were building everything here, too; many buildings have huge walls of glass on the west side facing the mountains. One of my favorite spots to study in the early afternoon is on the third floor of the library, where you can sit down on the balcony and watch everyone walk across the fields and just take in the landscape.

The people here are really great, too. I don’t feel like I have to be in a gifted program or an advanced group like band to find good people. Everyone here is really down-to-earth and genuine, and they don’t have to be in honors classes or anything to be that way. Part of this surely is because it’s college, so everyone who is here wants to be here, so there is none of that high school crowd that’s like, “I’m legally required to be here, but I don’t want to be here, so I’m just going to be a jackass and make everyone else’s time here suck.”

Living on my own is nice, too.  It doesn’t feel like something drastically changed and now I’m suddenly making tons of decisions for myself- I was so all over the place my senior year that sometimes home felt like it was just the place I came home to sleep in every night. But being completely in charge of my time and activities is nice. My floor turned out to be a really good one, and everyone is very outgoing. We just leave our doors open all the time and one can easily spend an entire day without leaving Corbett hall, and not get bored.

Classes here are interesting… It is just class, so it feels a lot like high school in some respects, but it’s a lot more relaxed. I’m in class for 15 hours a week instead of 30, and the profs are way less restrictive; they don’t treat you like a criminal or someone who needs to be tied down to their chair and pay attention. Instead, they actually figure that you’ll either take responsibility for your education, or you’ll fail. They don’t care either way.

I feel like I have a good balance of my logical and creative sides, doing a Business Administration major (that’s the one with the CIS concentration) and a Spanish major. I miss a lot of the fun liberal arts-type classes that I’ve taken before… I still miss Pullen’s history classes. A lot of the fun Honors classes would be great to take, but my AP credits already covered their degree requirements, so it would be a waste for me to take them.
I’m not really enjoying the business core classes, though. I decided to do Computer Information Systems, which is 27 credits of programming, instead of Computer Science, which is 60, because the CIS program provides a good business background (read: My job will not go to India and I won’t have to sit in a box all day writing code.) But I am honestly dreading all of the accounting, marketing, and business law classes… There are 34 credits in the core, meaning that it’s more than the actual programming classes themselves 😛
But I’m going to stick with it. At least for now. If I want to take more programming, I’ll get a Masters degree in Computer Science.

I miss drumline and band. Not terribly, but just playing electric drums in my dorm isn’t the same. I think it’s just a need for more musical involvement, not necessarily at school. I need to find people to jam with. Especially a bassist. Someone who can competently improvise melody would be AMAZING, too.

I’ve been listening to a lot of different music now. Here are my current favorites:

  • Regina Spektor
  • Louis Armstrong
  • Bill Bruford’s Earthworks
  • Acoustic Alchemy
  • Wendy Woo
  • The Mars Volta (like I’ve said before, Amputechture is amazing)

An interesting observation before I go: Colorado is much less diverse than Arizona. I think McClintock was something like 50% white, 30% hispanic, 12% black and maybe 8% asian. CSU is a LOT more white overall. But in the minorities that are present, however, I think that there is a lot less interracial tension here. People just happen to be different, but there aren’t huge cliques centered around race, which are definitely present in Arizona.

I’ve learned that I’m still bad at doing homework. I’m using the same procrastination-recovery techniques that I did in high school (what class can I ditch so I can do this homework that’s more important?). This is not good- it must change.

Other than that, things go good. Not much to say… but that’s not a bad thing. eh.

The PowerPoint slide in front of me right now (I’m in class) is the funniest thing I have ever learned about:
“How to extract insects accidentally lodged in the ear.”

Stressfulness :-P

I have a lot to say here… but no time. Or energy, really… Too tired.

I have a test and a big assignment due tomorrow…

And three tests on monday 😛
I’ll pull through. After tonight, I have pretty much three full days to prepare myself.

I am coming to Arizona from September 21 to 24. Let me know what you all are up to, I have limited time, but would love to touch base with you all.

New iPod line… *drool*

OK, I know it’s been really geeky here recently, but, well, I have been really geeky recently. Sue me.

Today Apple announced new iPods and iTunes 7. This is the coolest refresh I’ve seen to the line so far… The second-gen iPod nano and shuffle are definitely the coolest new things… But they updated the big guy, too:

  • 80GB Hard disk
  • 20 hour battery life
  • Gapless playback support
  • Top model price down to $349

I think that it may be time for me to upgrade. Gapless playback is huge for me, since I listen to so much Grateful Dead, Mars Volta, and Pink Floyd where the songs just segue into each other without warning. No current players on the market support this feature, so it’s a big deal. (I don’t know how they do it- gapless playback is literally impossible to encode in the MP3 or AAC formats…)
My trusty 40GB iPod still works great (well, except for the little fact that it is my third one on the warranty) and I have no problems with it. It’s very full though, and I hate trying to remember what’s on my iPod and what’s only on my computer hard drive. I could easily sell it off, too- I have tons of cases and accessories that won’t work with the new one. It would significantly reduce the cost of upgrading.
Of course I’m gonna sleep on it first. The thing just plays music, after all- not my usual technolust “I can’t stop thinking about this” thing.

iTunes 7 totally rocks, too… The gapless playback is there, plus a bunch of good visual and interface changes. I won’t go on about that here, just because that’s beyond even my limits of what is too geeky. I’ll just say that I’m very happy with it.